How do I even begin to explain the last three months?  This is very hard to do so I will just tell you some things I have learned along the way but before that, let me tell you where we are in the foster care process.

Last month Westin and I went to court to represent our little Micah Grace.  We don't have a say in anything but we go to the court hearings because we care deeply for this little girl.  We want to advocate for her.  The hearing is called a "Fact-Finding Hearing" where it is determined whether the child should be declared a dependent of the state and/or give evidence to the court.  I was very nervous.  I am not really sure why this particular hearing was so nerve racking for me.  Maybe it was the thought of someone coming in and telling us, "Sorry, we don't need you anymore.  Say goodbye and give us the child."  I know, it's a little extreme but a lot of things were going on in my head.

As we waited for Micah Grace's case to be called, I quietly prayed that God would give me peace in the midst of the hustle and bustle of lawyers, social workers, parents and/or advocates.  When her name was called we stepped into the courtroom and was escorted to the back to listen to the proceedings.  The state lawyer presented a case stating the mother requested her child to be adopted and the alleged father wasn't in the picture and/or returning correspondence.   He then requested for Baby Girl (Micah Grace's legal name) to be changed in order to receive a proper birth certificate and social security card.  He also requested for final publication to be published.  This is something that is required for all kids that have an unknown father or mother.  It's an ad that is placed in the classified section of the newspaper stating the baby's specific birth information.  It's a little weird but it is the final step the state makes in order to find biological parents.  Both of these requests were approved by the judge which was a huge blessing.  The judge proceeded to ask the lawyer why he isn't requesting to expedite the case and then scheduled another hearing for June 3rd.  We were pretty shocked the judge even cared about moving forward with Micah Grace's case at such a rapid pace.  Either way nothing could have been done then because the lawyer wasn't prepared with the correct paperwork to expedite the case.

So here we are...waiting.  Many have asked me how I can keep waiting for another couple of months.  This whole process has been about waiting on the Lord, so waiting some more doesn't really bother me. We know that Micah Grace will always be our daughter no matter what.  We don't need a judge to make it so.  She has captured our hearts forever.  Her story is a miracle.  She is with us because God wrote this before the beginning of time.  Every decision that was and has been made regarding her life has been infused with God's love and faithfulness.  There is a reason her mother didn't abort this little girl.  I thank God always for giving her mother the strength to give birth to this little miracle baby.

We are blessed.

Some things I have learned...

1. No book will ever be able to tell me what's best for my little girl...only she can show me that.

2. If the baby sleeps in my arms for another two/three hours it won't affect her sleeping habits for life.

3. Don't lose the pacifier before going to the doctor's appointment.  Always have at least two in the diaper bag for emergency purposes.

4. If the floors don't get cleaned for another 1, 2, 3, 4, etc. days, don't sweat it.  It's just the floor.  She is more important.

5. Becoming a parent is a hard adjustment.  Give a lot of grace.

6. Get out of the house and go for walks a lot.  It's good for the body and the soul.

7. Don't feel guilty when you finally sat down to read your Bible and the baby starts crying.  God can speak even through one or two verses.

8. If she wants to sleep in the bouncy seat, great.  At least she is sleeping.

9. No mother has it all together and if they look like they do they are putting on a good front.

10. People helping does not say you are a bad parent.